Who and what do I believe?
I am crying
and no one is hearing my cries,
much liken to the aborted child,
deaf ears to the cries,
dreams shattered, and defenses stolen!
I pray, rebuke, and put on God's armor.
Apparently I need a prayer team by my side.
The knot in my rope is frayed
and I am barely holding on.
God blesses and people take away.
I have no support system at all.
Some days my brain feels
"cloudy and muddled"
If I don't cry out,
my pleas will not be heard at all.
People refuse to listen to my praises
and turn deaf ears to my troubles.
So what do I do? I speak the truth!
My life is on the line and I need help.
So far it is a losing battle and should not be.
I am perplexed to say the least.
I want to pursue my God given talents.
I want off this stupid system of catch 22!
It is difficult to stay on an even keel,
too many people vying for the stern,
me, Uncle Sam, doctors, my family,
insurance companies.
Where's the justice? The scales are tilted! :-(
There is evidence I was seizuring
in ICU in 1988 and 1989.
*My medical records are a jungle
of errors and missed diagnoses.*
I am blessed with knowledge
for which some people curse,
others praise, and few here believe.
Sad the cursing comes from people
I have to be around.
God has blessed me with
the written word.
Praise You, Father; but,
please give me some peace!
I need some resolution to
these events, nightmare doors closed.
I want to get on with my life
being employed utilizing
my God given talents!
So doctors quit pushing nursing
and psych. evaluations.
If you can't handle my troubles,
that's your problem!
Who will help me?
Copyright © 1995 Carolyn Bigler
aka Moonlight Flower